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June 29, 2005

signs and wonders

"It is a wicked and a perverse generation," Jesus said to the Pharisees, "which seeks for a sign." Perversely enough, I seem to have a gift for making signs (in case you were seeking).

It started with last night's post with the church signs, created at churchsigngenerator.com. But my sign making days have just begun, because I've suddenly found I'm good at it. I just kinda look at a blank sign, and suddenly it starts to speak to me. Take this fortune cookie, for instance:

Dedicated to my brother.
This fortune cookie illustrates the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine."

The sign of the fortune cookie couldn't have been written any other way (don't bother trying, I already checked). But even more "sign"-ificant are those moments when a sign comes together in a single word:

Turn back, sinner man.
This bus illustrates another proverb: "The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

I also prize signs which seem to tell a story, or at least the beginning of a story:

Why do the groundskeepers wear orange jumpsuits?
As you travel down life's road, think long and hard about just how bad you have to use the bathroom.

All subtlety aside, sometimes a budding young signmaker must demonstrate versatility through directness:

Stay on message.
"I knew we should have stopped 425 miles back."

The ultimate aim of signmaking is always commercial, of course. At the end of the series you must work in a sly yet captivating product placement:

Come to ChezJoel.
When you're thinking refreshment, you're thinking Chez Joel!

Round one.
Homeless people save money on homeowners insurance.

Don't be afraid, when making signs, to borrow or even steal other people's ideas. If someone else has spent millions on a television ad campaign which is pure genious, for heaven's sake, use their material! And use their tools and software, too. For instance, I shamelessly copped all these signs from the homeless advocacy website sparesomechange.com and didn't even give them an attribution until the bottom of my blog entry.

Posted by joel at June 29, 2005 12:41 AM

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Mason jar, Dude. You gotta have a mason jar to make that 427 mile jump. And that next rest stop is right outside of Area 51, I'm thinkin'.

Posted by: Dabu Heebly [TypeKey Profile Page] at June 29, 2005 06:04 PM

Posted by: Worldgineer [TypeKey Profile Page] at June 30, 2005 04:43 PM

Oops, make that: 3

Posted by: Worldgineer [TypeKey Profile Page] at June 30, 2005 04:43 PM

Instant death, ha! Do not pass go; those utilities are murder if you get a monopoly. Reminds me of what my boss is always saying about moron programmers who left their moronic code behind: "I'm going to track them down, re-hire them, and then fire them again."

Posted by: Joel [TypeKey Profile Page] at July 1, 2005 01:56 AM

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