a danish by any other name

In the tradition which brought “Freedom Fries” to mom ‘n pop diners across America in the wake of 9/11 and France’s scurrilous cooing at Sadaam, Arabs are showing their umbrage at the Danes by no longer calling the delicious pastries they so love by their customary name. This comes straight from the top; the order was handed down by the Confectioners Union of Tehran.

I heard this story on the radio as I awoke this morning. The radio story didn’t give an alternate name for the sticky treats, however. And so as I got up I tried to imagine what new name the Arabs were using. Palistinian Pop-overs? Or maybe they prefer to have a Cinnamon Syrian with their Turkish coffee. Me, I’ve always thought that Danishes looked vaguely like a little turban. And the cherry in the middle looks like a little bomb…so maybe they call them “Mohammed’s Turban?” I don’t see a problem with this; it’s essentially a reproduction of the cartoon that started it all, minus the offensive depiction of the Prophet himself. The essential, non-offensive message–that Mohammed endorsed the violent slaying of infidels–is left intact.

But it turns out that the truth is much better than I imagined. The next time I’m in Iran, I’m going to make a special point of ordering a Cheese-filled Rose of The Prophet Mohammed.